Stay at Home...Slob?

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Here are some major signs telling you your "stay-at-home-mom-style" (or lack thereof) has hit rock bottom: 

• You're on the floor playing with your 18 month old when he toddles up behind you and gives you a wedgie.  After the hilarity wears off, you realize either you're wearing granny panties, or you're wearing sweatpants again...or both.

Okay...that one's kinda funny

• Your husband comes in the door from work and rushes to take your child from your arms exclaiming "you must have had a rough day-you haven't even been able to shower!  Go upstairs and relax.  I'll take care of LG."  Ummm...that's actually very sweet, but I did in fact shower...and I put makeup on.  So...yeah.

Well, that one's not so bad I guess.  I do look a little tired...

• You get home from running errands and immediately shed your stretchy yoga pants for a much more comfortable pair of men's sweatpants.  Because yoga pants are so restricting...

Ok, Ok...I'll admit...when yoga pants start to feel uncomfortable...that's bad.  But maybe it's just that particular brand of yoga pant? 

• Your husband very delicately asks you if sports bras are really that much more comfortable than "normal" bras

Umm...the sports bras I wear are more comfortable!  And I'm saving money by not purchasing expensive bras, right?

• You spot a sorority sister you haven't seen in a couple years at Target and immediately avoid eye contact so you don't have to be a normal, social person and say hello.  The reason being you made the awesome decision to not shower or brush your teeth.  You also decided to clothe yourself in a pair of ill-fitting exercise pants with a yogurt-stained running jacket from your high-school days (that hasn't been used for running since).  Of course, you're not trying to be vain...you just don't want to scare her children.  Or knock her out with your amazing breath.  

Okay...that's starting to get bad.  Now my slobby-ness is starting to determine my social-ness.  I'm thinking about counseling...

• The doorbell rings unexpectedly and you peek out the window to see the exterminator is at the door.  Before you can answer, you must quickly change from one pair of sweatpants to a more "presentable" pair of sweatpants so as not to look trashy.  You then come to the sad realization that, not only did you feel under-dressed for the exterminator, but you have a "trashy" pair of sweatpants and a more "formal" pair of sweatpants.  

Things are getting worse.  Do I really categorize sweatpants in my mind?  And even worse...make a distinction between "trashy" ones and "formal" ones?  Is the phrase "formal sweatpants" an oxymoron?  Aren't all sweatpants kinda trashy?  Ugh...my brain hurts!

• You start to consider showering "dressing up".  As in:  "What are you wearing to dinner?"  "Well, I'm going to shower, so..."

Well...that might be rock bottom.  Showering is not a viable outfit option.  It's more like a requirement, no?  Time for a change perhaps?  In fact, as I type, I am wearing one of Gumshoe's sweatshirts and a pair of his athletic shorts.  AND my child is not wearing any pants.  When the children start to suffer... 



Oh well!  Happy Friday and I hope your weekend is filled with sweatpants style! 

What the Crock!?!

What is a crock, you ask?  Well...let me introduce you!  

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A crock is a large antique earthenware vessel and according to one website:

"Crocks were an indispensable part of the efficient kitchen until the Mason jar came into common use in the early 1900s. They were used as plastic containers or ziptop bags might be used in the modern kitchen." 

Umm...right.  I totally see the obvious comparison between these and ziploc baggies.  

Why am I doing a post on crocks (other than the fact that I can't think of anything to post about)?  Lucky for me, Gumshoe has a very old-man-ish and weird unique appreciation for antique earthenware and as a result, we own no fewer than 15 of these gems.  They range in size from 2 gallons to 20 gallons and there would be many more, but I instituted a one in/one out rule on them.  I also instituted a "if we're going to keep it, we have to utilize it" rule while we give Casa de Gumshoe her face lift.

Truth be told, the real reason Gumshoe likes these fine pieces of history is because they also used to make and store beer in them and Gumshoe likes anything having to do with making beer.  But since I'm not a big fan of letting my food rot in giant clay containers in the kitchen or homemade beer, I've had to get creative with our crockery.  Here are some great uses for your ridiculous large collection of crocks:

Add a very "mature-but-still-young-professional" look to your home office with the trashcan crock.  Your young-professional friends will probably laugh and ask you what crock you keep your stash of Werthers Original

Nothing says romance in the bedroom quite like a fifteen gallon blanket holder

A completely baby-safe toy container...really...there aren't any rusty handles on the sides of this crock...honest.  Be sure those tetanus shots are updated

There's the ever-popular "3 crocks under the entry table" decor idea.  For maximum appeal, arrange them in an eye-catching small/large/small arrangement like so

Don't forget shoe storage.  Because it's so convenient to dig through piles of shoes to find yours at the bottom.  It's a great way to keep your shoes in good shape, too.  Be sure to pile your husband's giant shoes on top of yours to really keep them fresh and new looking!

More toy  and fort-building-accessory storage.  Again, in the beautiful small/large/small arrangement.

And of course...always keep an overflow of moonshine jugs in your storage area in case you ever need a career backup plan.  In fact...forget an emergency fund!  Just make sure your moonshine operation is ready to be up and running at a moment's notice.

And what goes better with a nerdy pottery collection than some nerdy pottery collection literature?

And there you have it.  Plenty of creative ideas for your ever-growing crock collection!  What?  We're the only ones with a crock collection?  Hmmmm...

Weekend in Pics

Easter weekend!  For all of the festivities, it still felt like a really relaxing weekend.  LG got his very first Easter basket, went to his very first Easter egg hunt and wriggled around during Easter service at church...typical.  Not unlike every other Sunday at church...at least he wasn't screaming :)

I got my 'hair did'

We ran errands in our camo jimmer-jams

We started a fun art project (more pics to come)

We went to our very first Easter egg hunt at church

That entire field was filled with eggs

LG was very confused by the whole thing

So he ran away

LG got his first Easter basket

Because what goes with celebrating Jesus better than fighting dinosaurs?

We did some off-roading on our new ATV

And the food...

I mean, really...I have no clue why I can't drop these last few pounds...

I eat really healthy...

Seriously...I don't understand...

why those pounds aren't just MELTING off of me!

And here's how Dogshoe celebrated...

Hope you had a beautiful Easter weekend!

Happy Easter Weekend!

I've been wondering what amazingly funny post I was going to do today.  I mean...all of my posts are so amazing and funny, I've really set the bar high for myself and it can be hard to keep up.  I picked Gumshoe's brain about all the crazy cop stuff that happened at work this week and it turns out...he spent a lot of time in the office.  Lame!  Almost as lame as his favorite shirt...(and I mean 'lame' in the nicest way Uncle Robert-thank you for that wonderful Christmas gift!)

So then I turned to my next best resource...LG.  Whatcha got for me?

Ummm...I'm just gonna move this here...

then I'm just gonna get my leg up here...ugh...errr...

maybe if I just move this chair a leeetle bit more...

then try this leg...

ugh...maybe this leg again...must. get. to. snacks...

dad...help

Okay...so he's clearly busy.  

Then I realized...I haven't really seen the funny in a lot of things this week.  It's been a bit of a tough week for me.  Sometimes I just get caught up in all the "stuff" and start feeling overwhelmed and discouraged about all the things I don't have, all the things I want to do around the house but can't because it's not in the budget right now, all the fine lines I'm starting to notice on my skin, all the awesome outfits others seem to have and I don't, etc.  It's all about "stuff" and I easily lose perspective on what's important.

After some introspection...I realized that I'm busy tying my happiness to my circumstances rather than my faith and if that's the case...I'll never be happy!  I need to tie my happiness to the unwavering truth:

I'm so blessed to have a Savior that was willing to take on my sin and die on a cross for me
I'm so blessed to have a Savior who not only died on a cross, but rose again and is ALIVE
I'm so blessed to have a God who listens and loves and answers prayers
I'm so blessed to have a King whose mercies are new each day
We are so blessed to have this faith...

...and we are so blessed to have Cadbury eggs...
OK-obviously not in the same category, but I consider these a blessing...and God has a sense of humor, 'kay?

These are the things I need to tie my happiness to and these are the things that I'm focusing on this Easter weekend!

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Hope you have a happy and blessed Easter weekend!

Embracing my Inner Wrestler

It's Embrace the Camera time! 

18 months is such a fun age!  Those fun "boy" characteristics are really starting to come out and he loves to roughhouse.  We're working on a wrestling name...maybe "Little Leveler" or "Gumshoe Grappler"...what do you think?

Embrace the camera, won't you? Click on the button and join in!

Have You Heard...

About Birchbox??

Well...lucky for you, my Birchbox came in the mail yesterday.  Why lucky for you?  Because if it hadn't, I would be posting about the fake balls that some guys hang from the backs of their trailer hitches...have you seen those?  Ugh.  Disgust!  Don't worry though...I have a whole post brewin' in my noggin about that one!

OK-back to Birchbox.  You can learn more about it here.  In short, you sign up for the $10/month subscription and each month Birchbox sends out deluxe beauty samples for you to try out. In cute little packaging, too!  And if you're looking for a unique and fun gift idea...you can gift in 3, 6, and 12 month increments.  I gifted it for my sissies and Gumshoe overheard me delicately pounding the idea into his skull and got it for me.  

It makes us gals who buy the majority of our clothes, accessories, shoes, jewelry makeup at Target feel all posh inside.  Enough jibber-jabber...here's what I got this month:

Zoya nail polish in a chic violet/gray

Suki exfoliating foaming cleanser

Zhena's Gypsy Tea: caffeine free herbal tea with chamomile, hibiscus, lemon and vanilla

Ooh...a surprise

Waleda Wild Rose Smoothing Facial Lotion and LIV GRN Perfume

This box had a "green theme" for April.  So fun!  Can't wait to try 'em out!  

Here's what came last month:

The brow brush at the bottom I now use everyday and this box also came with Pangea Organics face mask, Pangea Organics lip balm, Befine night cream, Pomega 5 moisturizing face treatment and Marvis Italian toothpaste.  I mean, why use Crest when the Italians are making fancy toothpaste?  Oh...now I remember...because the Italian toothpaste is $12 a tube.  Is it even FDA approved, you ask?  Psh...whateva!  That's not the point.  It's European and glamorous, 'kay?


Check it out...it's so much fun!